Closeted gay people have an extra burden that straight people generally do not, but closeted gay people also (generally) aren't dating - because they're closeted.
We're not unusual, difficult to decipher or hard to understand. Dating for us looks like dating for you - because we're dating.
You know that not everyone wants “the surgery,” and not to ask if they do. Simple definitions aren’t enough: we need to be talking about lived realities.
So here’s your Trans 201 lesson on 10 common misconceptions. Virtually every transgender person is outed during the vetting process.
Barack Obama’s resounding win in 2008 looked like it might turn the tide for Democrats after the just-missed presidential campaigns of 20, but that was a fluke.
I found it interesting both that the issue is in the forefront of the news in Ghana today, and that there is now an official Gay and Lesbian Association of Ghana (GALAG), with a spokesperson who is not afraid to appear in public. The article points out that Ghana’s heros have come out publicly in support of gay and lesbian rights, “Nelson Mandela said that he considered “homosexuality to be just another form of sexuality that has been suppressed for years”; Kofi Annan, a former UN General Secretary, supported gay rights with a move to extend benefits to the same-sex partners of UN staff; and as well as signing the UN declaration calling for the decriminalisation of homosexuality, Obama also recently spoke at a Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender (LGBT) Pride event, describing homophobia as an example of “worn arguments and old attitudes”.
Yet deeply entrenched cultural attitudes in Ghana die hard.
We date folks who aren't into us, just like you do; we mistake infatuation for love, just like you do; we fret over when to say, "I love you," just like you do; we worry that we'll appear "too needy" if we call too quickly, or that we'll appear disinterested, if we don't, just like you do. Trans folks have the added layer of difficulty which is the whole issue of if or when it's safe to come out to people about their gender history.
But there again, trans people aren't some different species. If you can think of a dating problem straight people have, LGBT people have that problem.
Edit: all of this is to say any "ground rule" you might propose for straight dating is going to be riddled with exceptions.